May the 4th be with you. Yes, most of us know it's Star Wars Day. When I taught, I would tell my students, "Metaphors be with you." I still chuckle when I hear that.
We know there's Cinco de Mayo, Mother's Day, and the Kentucky Derby during the month of May; but those are pretty ordinary. I have brought you some of May's not-so-ordinary (or extraordinary, depending on which way you look at it) observances.
1) Stepmother's Day -- I didn't even know such a day existed. I'm guessing you didn't, either.
2) National Play Your Ukelele Day -- because everyone has a spare ukelele in their closet.
3) National Special-abled Pet Day -- Okay, this one makes sense to me; I have a 3-legged dog. Don't judge me.
4) Great American Grumpout -- For the percentage who don't celebrate Star Wars Day.
5) Occupational Health & Safety Health Professionals' Day -- yeah, so they can have the day off from all the drunkards celebrating Mexico.
6) National Day to Prevent Teen Pregnancy AND No Pants Day -- 'nuff said.
7) National Babysitter's Day -- Lucky for you guys, it's on a Saturday this year. Celebrate by watching my kids.
8) No Socks Day -- I guess this isn't too far off....I mean, I AM in Kentucky, after all.
9) Mothers at the Wall Day -- I hope they mean the Wal-Mart, otherwise I have no idea what they mean.
10) Windmill Day -- Can't leave the windmills out.
11) Eat What You Want Day -- Okay, I think I will. Since I do everyday anyway.
12) National Nutty Fudge Day -- oh, boy.....I can see the toilet bowl prank photos now....
13) Blame Someone Else Day -- Now you actually have an excuse for placing ill blame.
14) National Chicken Dance Day -- Yesssssssss. Bust it out.
15) Nylon Stockings Day -- In May?! Are you kidding?!
16) Biographer's Day -- Salute those who dare to delve into the lives of others.
17) World Hypertension Day -- Perfect excuse to explain being stressed out.
18) Visit Your Relatives Day -- Hell no.
19) Boys Club Day -- for all you boys who still have clubs.
20) Mike the Headless Chicken Day -- You just have to read it for yourself: www.miketheheadlesschicken.org/story.php
21) I Need a Patch For that Day -- Ya got one for that hole in your head?
22) Neighbor Day -- Go ahead, let them have that cup of sugar instead of just borrow it.
23) National Taffy Day -- Yum.
24) Brother's Day -- Wow. I didn't know this one existed, either.
25) Towel Day -- Yep. Just the way it sounds. You wear a towel (preferably over your clothes.)
26) Scripps' National Spelling Bee -- I LIVE for this moment. EUONYM!
27) Cellophane Tape Day AND National Wig Out Day -- I have no words.
28) International Jazz Day -- Finally one worth something.
29) Rural Life Sunday Day -- Actually pronounced "Sundee."
30) Loomis Day -- The first wireless communication.
31) World No-Tobacco Day -- uhhhh, yeah right. No backer? Fraid not.
There are so many others, but too many to list in one place. Happy May, everyone.
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